I gave up on the lottery dream. I don’t think it’s impossible to win, but that can’t ever happen to me. I honestly don’t believe I will ever win. I always get that irritating feeling when I pick the tickets, and every single one of them looks the same, covered with invisible letters which say: don’t bother to choose, there are no winners here! At some point, I realized that it was pointless to buy the illusion – something I believe it doesn’t belong to me. That’s the thing with a lottery ticket.
But also with all the other great things in life. Have you ever wondered why some things are so great in our heads? Did you go a little further and ask yourself what kind of things do you expect to happen to you? Is there a strict line between the things we want and the things we think we deserve?
How often does something great and unexpected happen to you? They raised us to be humble and obedient. To be discreet and polite. They told us that some things are far beyond our reach.
We grew up stifling the most intense years of our lives through a little hole of modesty and discretion, although we have often felt that it would be hard to push them even through the door of the greatest hangar. Suddenly, we found ourselves in the place where all those big questions are fading, become lesser and fewer, and completely irrelevant.
Suddenly, we are not faced with questions anymore. We are faced with other’s answers, wondering who put them in front of our faces. Answers that boiled as long as Julie Child’s Boeuf Bourguignonne, and have a taste like a soggy lunch. Suddenly we are faced with warmish versions of ourselves, versions which hadn’t expect great things because great things only bring great disappointments. Or so they told us. It’s so much better to hop on a train with everyone else in which we always have a place to sit, rather than freezing on some road and waiting that someone unknown to pick us up. It’s better to choose a safe train over another uncertain possibility of getting somewhere. The train is warm and full of familiar faces. We can always talk and complain to someone because we don’t have many other topics to talk about anyway. Since we have been traveling by that train for ages, it wouldn’t be easy to imagine we replace it with an airplane we see from the train window every day. We secretly daydream about boarding on that plane, but in the very next moment, we realize that it is just one of those impossible scenarios in our lives. We grew up believing that great things can happen to chosen ones. It is just impossible to happen to everyone.
We were discouraged by those who have never been brave enough to try.
Questions no longer exist, and we don’t think about changing the way we live anymore.
Still, we dream about that plane from time to time. It reminds us of all those questions we asked ourselves a long time ago until we came in an age when we no longer have too much time for breaking personal boundaries. Age when we forgot that we only have to buy a ticket to get on that plane. Small steps we forgot along the way are a path we need to follow.
We only expect what we have experienced.
Great things are far beyond our reach.
They convinced us that some people, unlike the others, are born lucky. They have permission to live a great life.
And we will manage somehow. The most important thing is that we are safe and protected.
Great things that will never happen to me:
- I will never win a lottery
- I will never be financially independent
- I will never do something meaningful and great
- My dreams will never come true
- I will never find the right person for me
Things that happen to us all the time:
- Something that we were looking forward so much went wrong
- We had to sit on the plane to believe that we are traveling (something can always go wrong)
- We think that some things are just too good to be true
- We strongly believe that some things are impossible
- We want to meet Mr. Right guy so much, but we only attract losers
It seems like we are preparing for negativity all the time. It doesn’t surprise us. Our mistrust blocks all possibilities on our way.
We think it’s impossible and too good to be happening to us.
Why are we so different from other passengers from the train we drive in every day?
Nothing great happens to anyone there, so why should it happen to us? In the end, we feel solidarity with the group from the train. What makes us better than them? For the 100th time, we choose to fit over to fight. And in the end, I will agree. It takes time for great things to happen. Time to start over. With your steps.
Time to get stronger.
Great things are often so near, but we have to reach for them.
Blush because we were only one who didn’ believe in ourselves. Others were to busy fighting with their fears and thoughts.
We were hiding in front of an empty theater.
We were hiding in front of ourselves.
In the end, great things really can happen to everyone. You only have to believe that you deserve them and that people who were born lucky don’t exist. They were just born, like the rest of us.
Luck is a matter of our choice and belief.